Me and Gertrude: The Relationship Between Me and My Volvo
Matthew Blair - ipd customer
Matt Blair and his 2000 XC70 To answer the question that you probably already want to ask is: Yes, I named my car Gertrude, Gertrude Grylls to be specific. She is a 2000 V70 XC SE, my first Volvo, and my first real car. I have owned other vehicles, but they were all “point A-to-point B” cars. I bought her in September of 2007 after I returned home from Iraq, where I was deployed with my Army Reserve unit Alpha Co. 324th Signal Battalion. I knew that I wanted a wagon, turbocharged, around $7000, and hopefully all-wheel drive. I had found a few Foresters, Imprezas, and Passats in the Richmond area on-line, and had started saving up my paychecks so that I could pay with cash when I got home. A few days after I returned my sister and I went to look at a few cars that I had found within my price range, and that satisfied my wants. The very first car we went to look at was a 2000 blue Volvo XC SE that had slightly high mileage, but had a clean Carfax report and was reasonably priced around $5800. We walked around the side of the building to where the car was being detailed, and something immediately clicked inside of my head when I saw the car and thought, “She is the perfect car for me”. I walked around the car looking at it from all angles. The subtle body lines and the “brick” styling struck me as classic and timeless. More importantly Volvo’s reputation for safety, reliability, comfort, and class really assured me that it would function in good order as long as it was properly and routinely maintained. We took a quick test drive and I felt that the engine was powerful enough to be sporty yet efficient enough to be economical, and that the all-wheel drive system would help keep me safely going in the right direction. I reckoned that the SE in the title stood for “Sport Edition”, and that it was the responsible and mature way to satisfy my inner speed-demon, corner-carving, roadway-ruling child. C’mon, we all know that there is a little racing passion in all of us. For example, how many people drove a little too “fast and furious” after watching Bullit or Gone in 60 Seconds? As we pulled back into the lot I turned to the salesperson and offered them $5000. Gertrude was mine.  |  | "I wanted Gertrude to be a utilitarian, multifunctional vehicle." I’ve always named my cars, a habit picked up from watching “The Dukes of Hazzard” as a child and as an adult it always seems like buying a car is the beginning of a long-term relationship. So after I bought her I spent the first few weeks taking road trips to visit my family and friends, and to show off my new car. Almost everyone joked me about my decision to buy a Volvo station wagon (Was I planning to flirt with soccer moms, that it’s a grandmother’s car, and so forth) then complimented me on a wise and safe choice. Well the jokes got me thinking about women who do drive Volvo’s, and the only woman I could think of driving my car was Gert Boyle, the chairwoman for Columbia Sportswear Company, so I named her Gertrude. It made sense to me: tough, dependable, outdoorsy, and utilitarian. And of course “Grylls” is from Bear Grylls, who hosts Man Vs Wild. So there I was, all happy and pleased that I got a great car, in great condition, and for a great price. I started doing small custom modifications to fit her namesake. I wanted Gertrude to be a utilitarian, multifunctional vehicle. I added a Yakima BlockHead bike mount in the rear after I removed the hide-away seats. I then installed a first aid kit, jumper cables, and tow rope to where the bottom portion of the hide-away seat was, and removed the rear seat belts and their related hardware. Inside the spare tire I’ve wedged an air compressor/searchlight, an emergency tool kit, and a few bungee cords. In the glove box I’ve got my TomTom, a battery-free flashlight, and my Gerber multi-tool. I bought the IPD tailgate repair panel kit, and then shortly thereafter I bought the IPD polyurethane upper engine stabilizer mount. I even changed my oil to Royal Purple full synthetic. We were good to go. Then I accidentally hit a curb as I was pulling into a parking lot. I didn’t think anything had been damaged because I was only going about 3 mph, but that slight bump knocked her out of alignment. I didn’t notice for a few months until I saw that her tires were wearing out unevenly. So I took her to get an alignment the following day, and turns out I had bent my left front tie rod. So I replaced both sides with the IPD heavy duty swaybar endlinks, new tie rod ends, and inner tie rods. Then about a month ago my radiator developed a crack and I replaced that as well as the MAF air mass sensor. Now that I’ve got all the “broken” parts fixed or upgraded my goal is to get Gertrude to a stage 0 plus level. I’m not going for horsepower or quickness; I just want her to run reliably and efficiently for years to come. I plan on replacing all the engine gaskets and seals, upgrading to Bilstein heavy duty struts along with the IPD HD upper spring seats, replacing the PCV kit, HD turbo control valve, swaybars…. Well I could go on but I’m sure that all of you have a wish list for your car as well. I also want to do some of the modifications myself, like a DIY intake and having to turn my battery sideways. There’s always something to do or something that needs to be done in order for Gertrude to be at her best. It’s a work in progress, just like any relationship. -ipd |
